Gale Harold Exposé

The Glorious Gestalt of Gale

Harold

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Remember Guns 'n' Roses? Music in the 80's had degenerated into

synthesized fluff and a morass of pop platitudes that left the remnants

of the Rock generation cold. Then suddenly, from nowhere, there

they were - hairspray and tattoos and miles and miles of attitude.

Black leather and heroin and biceps to die for. And Guitars - actual

balls-to-the-wall riffs wailing and screaming and scratching their way

into our very souls. Not a synthesizer in sight. Fuck the New Wave -

Rock was BACK, baby, all the way. Welcome to the Jungle became

the anthem of a new generation of Drugs, Sex and Rock 'n'Roll.

That, my friends, was a GESTALT. For one brief moment in time,

the planets aligned and all the elements clicked into perfect Harmony

and the whole became more than the sum of its parts. It didn't matter

that it didn't last. Frankly, they should have stopped with one album.

They started going to hell the minute Axl stopped teasing his hair.

Music was fun and gritty and blues-y like the Stones and the Faces

before them. Those of us who enjoyed the torrent of Metal and

Grunge that followed owe most of it to G'n'R.

At this point, you're asking yourself "what has this got to do with

Gale Harold?" My answer would be "Everything!" The producers of

Queer As Folk have stated that "he fell out of the sky - there's no

other explanation" but I disagree. It was time - more than time - for a

Gay Superhero/Anti-Hero and he needed to pull the mainstream,

mediocre Middle just a little farther toward the Lascivious Left . If

Gays are ever going to have true political representation, full exercise

of their civil rights, and the safety and dignity that Middle America

takes for granted, they have to lose the stigma of being "different".

The only way that happens is for the Middle to move past its

adolescent views of sexuality. The average person must become, in

effect, "unshockable" where Gay sex is concerned. That's a tall order.

Where to start?

Well our Gay Hero - let's call him G.H. for simplicity's sake - has to

appeal to more than just the 10% of the population that happen to be Gay. (I

think that number is really LOW. Gay men run the world is my perception,

and most people have some kind of homosexual experience. 50% is probably

closer, but that's just my opinion and it belongs in another article.) It's going

to be hard to draw straight men in - they have "issues." They will, however,

tune in if they think it leads to getting lucky. So our G.H. needs to appeal to

women. Most social change begins with women anyway, since they raise and

educate and socialize most of us, in our early years at least. How do you make

a G.H. appeal to women? You make him straight. It may seem a little odd for

the feature character in a Gay-themed show to be played by a straight actor,

but after all, it is acting... and if you want this G.H. to draw the ladies in, he'd

better be unequivocally straight - maybe an ex-construction worker who drives

a truck. These aren't hard and fast rules - Randy Harrison and Peter Paige

have lots of female fans - but for sheer volume, the women who watch the

show need to lust without reservation. What single woman in this day and age

hasn't had a crush on a guy who turned out to be Gay? Once you've been

through that, your "GAYdar" gets sharp as a tack to prevent further

embarrassment. No, our G.H. definitely needs to be straight. And gorgeous.

Our G.H. has to be comfortable with his role. This is Showtime we're talking

about and Queer As Folk was going to take that "No Limits" tag line all the

way if it could. Playing Brian Kinney, Uber-Queer King of the club scene is a

tall order for any actor. He's got to be in great shape, and completely at ease

with his body. Brian spends a good part of his screen time in various states of

undress including total, and occasionally full-frontal, exposure. He should

probably be athletic - like a former college soccer player. He also has to be

able to cut a dashing swath through a club full of hot dancing Gay boys, so he

should probably be tall, thin and angular. Fabulous bone structure and a

perfect face are mandatory. Attitude is everything because Brian is all about

The Image, so our G.H. should have Charisma.

So far our G.H. is supremely masculine, physically ideal and able to convince

men and women that he's walking sex. Sex. What about the Sex? Brian

Kinney has lots of sex and ALL of it is with Men. How's a straight guy

supposed to deal with that? He'll have to be open-minded, like the kind of guy

who reads The Nation Magazine and is not fond of Republicans. It'll help if

this G.H. has been trained as an artist - obviously he'll be a trained actor, but it

might help if he actually went to art school, so he'll be used to thinking more

about the Art than the Act. Artistic Vision is absolutely required in depicting

the sex, because Brian is a sexual savant who has done everything - and

everyone. Even a brief turn in art school would create an openness and

sophistication that would enhance his ability to portray Brian's sexuality in a

real and raw way.

Brian is more than a sex

machine, though. He adores his

son, he's a fiercely loyal friend

and he's capable of extreme self-

sacrifice. Beneath the Attitude,

there has to be a heart. Maybe

our G.H. needs to have a had a

few disappointments, like

walking away from a scholarship

or two. Being so broke

occasionally that he can't buy

gas to get to an audition. It

would also help if he started out

as a laid-back Southern boy, so

all that disappointment doesn't

make him too bitter.

Brian is also very successful, so our G.H. has to be intelligent. It would help if

he had a literary bent, because he needs to be articulate. Brian is an Ad exec.,

so he has to do more than look good in a designer suit. He has to make award-

winning presentations. It would help if our G.H. had read some Oscar Wilde,

and maybe even studied Romance Literature at American University.

Now, let's re-cap. Our G.H. needs to be physically ideal, straight, smart, sexy,

literate, caring, sophisitcated, charismatic, open, artistic, self-confident,

handsome, and Hot as Hell. Where are you going to find a man like that? For

one brief moment in time, the planets aligned and all the elements clicked into

perfect Harmony and the whole became more than the sum of its parts. And

that is the glorious gestalt that is Gale Harold.